Privacy Policy

Seriously, I Take Your Privacy Seriously

I built this website with tender loving care. I mean that, it’s more like a sculpture than a string of code. Every line that you see on the front end here was 100% written with the ten fingers attached to my two hands, and I know what all it’s doing.

I have three ways for you to willingly provide me with information:

  • Submit a comment on the blog, which I may occasionally permit.
  • Submit my contact form.
  • Submit an event to a forthcoming calendar feature.

When you voluntarily decide to do this, I collect whatever information you type in, or your device auto-fills. Nothing is saved until you click the button that submits the form, which is always absolutely clear.

I also collect the following information, to help fight SPAM, because while some email service providers and online solutions are able to prevent that nasty stuff, our government — who makes ridiculous laws that hurt small businesses but don’t stop people from SPAMming, scamming and robo-dialing us all day long — is completely unable. Yet here I am, writing this ridiculous Privacy Policy. Anyway, I collect this additional info about you, specifically to try and fight SPAM:

  • Your IP address, which is a number that is assigned to you by your ISP. IP means “Internet Protocol” and ISP means “Internet Service Provider,” or “the company that’s connecting you to the Internet.” Think Verizon or Starlink or Comcast.
  • Your User Agent. This is a long string of information about the type of computer you have and which browser you’re using, and versions of those things.
  • Your Referer. This is often just the page you were on before you got to the page where you’re submitting the form. I didn’t misspell it, either, some genius who invented some part of the way the web works did. I wouldn’t blame you if you blamed Al Gore.

That’s it! And all of that can be faked, so it’s probably half-pointless to even detect it, but it does help me send your info to a service — Akismet.com as of 10/11/2023 — who evaluates your name, email and the message you sent, to see if you’re likely SPAM or not. So don’t use my website and definitely, please don’t submit any forms on this — or any other, for that matter — website because we’re pretty much all doing something like this. If you post pictures of your kids on Facebook and then complain about privacy, for example, you should have to be blacklisted to a room containing only rotary phones with Roman Numerals on the dial. Or is it called a rotor? Rotar? Anyway…

So, I send your info to the above-mentioned Akismet SPAM-fighting service.

I also send it to Google. It’s too late. The second you hopped on this website, and a million others, similar stuff to what is above was sent to Google. It’s how we know if 10 or 10 billion people visit our websites. It’s how we make free stuff for you to read, watch, play and post online.

When you loaded any page on this website, Google Analytics fired up. It grabbed your IP address, and your User Agent. It figured out roughly where you are at and what kind of phone you use based on that. It then added you to a plethora of data that I use, without specifically knowing who you are, to see if my website is doing what I want it to do. They may get your name and email, if you’re logged into Google, say, via Chrome, but I don’t personally see that via “GA” as it’s commonly known.

You can do a web search to see what all Google Analytics collects. You’ll probably do that on Google, in which case you’ll give them even more info about yourself!

Don’t want to be tracked? You can learn how to turn off Javascript altogether (the Internet will suddenly seem very, very broken) and use a search engine like DuckDuckGo. Just be sure to never use your phone or an Alexa or walk in a public space again, because you are, like kind of always, being tracked in this world.

All of that said, I really do take your privacy seriously, and otherwise do not sell or give away your information to anyone, or any other organizations than the two listed above. That’s Akismet — for personally identifiable info you supply — and Google, if you needed a recap.